About two weeks from my first blog post, I didn't know what to expect. But I didn't expect myself to be at the same place I was 2 weeks ago. This is what I get for believing that I was going to change. I'm getting stupider by the day. More out of shape. Sadder. Lonelier.
Am I just not trying hard enough? Am I too incompetent to just simply do what I need to do to improve myself? What's wrong with me?
I won't make this a long blog. But as annoying as the downer side of me is, I hope that I can change and break this cycle. I'm sick of going through these depressive mood swings and then suddenly I feel a slight ray of hope, only for me to waste it by being a useless freak and watching YouTube videos all day. I seriously need to get away from YouTube. It's tough but every day I get tired and watch YouTube. Every weekend, I don't feel like doing anything but watch YouTube. It's honestly driving me insane.
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